This morning, I returned home from a meeting, greeted by the sound of my dishwasher running. A good friend had already taken time out of her morning to play with my son while I attended a Parent Advisory Council for our school district. She didn’t need to do my dishes by any means and I certainly didn’t expect it. But it’s hard for me to explain how touched I was by what probably seemed like a small gesture to her. Those dishes looked like a mountain to conquer to me and she eliminated that stress from my day.
When you are feeling under the weather, overwhelmed, exhausted, or simply not at your best, it’s amazing what a difference a simple gesture from a friend can make. I am humbled by the dear friends I have who have an innate understanding that simple gestures and small acts can have a tremendous influence. I am surrounded by women who have their own families (many of them larger than my own), work, family commitments, volunteer service, but they still find time to care for me.
So, if it crosses your mind to call someone, send them a note, drop by a pizza, invite their child over for a play date, scrub some dishes, or just to let someone know you’re there if they need you, don’t talk yourself out of it. Don’t convince yourself it’s small, because it matters.
Small Act. Big Impact.
My husband had me listen to an NPR story recently about a young homeless woman who eventually made it to Harvard. It’s a bit long, but very moving and inspiring, especially as she discusses knowing that she was loved despite the neglect she grew up in.
There is one part that stood out to me, especially the conclusion she comes to at the end:
Liz Murray, you were just telling us how you had this outpouring of offers of help and attention when your story became public. Can you tell us – I just loved the story of the woman who offered to do your laundry.
Ms. MURRAY: She rocked. I love her.
(Soundbite of laughter)
Ms. MURRAY: She showed up at my school. You know, I didn’t know any of these folks. So you can imagine, at the time, being a little freaked out – 18 years old, people showing up at the lobby of my school or sending me letters.
And I came out one day, and she was outside on the sidewalk, waiting for the time when school would dismiss. And there she was with her green station wagon, minivan thing. And she said to me: Liz, shame on me. You know, she introduced herself, said: Shame on me. I’ve had your news article up on my refrigerator for weeks, and I told myself I couldn’t help you because, well, I don’t have much money. But then today, sweetheart, I was doing my daughter’s laundry, and it occurred to me: Liz must have some laundry. Doesn’t everybody have some laundry?
So she drove over the bridge from New Jersey, came over, opened up the door to her car and said: Do you have some laundry? And she pointed in. There were these plastic bins. She did my laundry once a week, every week, the entire last semester of school.
LUDDEN: Wow.
Ms. MURRAY: She said I can’t do much, but I know I can do that.
LUDDEN: That proves there’s something everyone can do.
(Soundbite of laughter)
Ms. MURRAY: Right. Well, you know, I think what that comes from, right, because we’re always sort of hit up for things – donate this, donate that. And I think we get cynical.
We start, oh, feed the homeless man. He’s still homeless. I send $100 to Haiti. Have I solved the whole problem? I think that’s the wrong question – have I solved the whole problem? I think the question is just, really: Have I done my part? And that’s what these folks taught me.
You my sweet daughter have a beautiful soul and I love you very much.
This is a wonderful story of self-sacrifice. Just like the woman who poured the oil on Jesus’s feet.
Now I have to think about who and how I can bless someone!
Beautiful post… made me tear… will be passing on this good karma!
It’s funny, I was just talking about this very thing. When I took my car to Macco to repair some damage I’d done, it wasn’t the beautiful paint job they did or the awesome customer service while my kids ran around the place, it was the fact that they cleaned the interior of my car! The kleenex, crusty food, smudges on the windows. THey cleaned my car! I was so grateful. I sent a thank you note.
The little things.
Oh Mindy, I love, love, love this! So important to remember that it doesn’t have to be something big to make a difference!
-Ally