Me: All I want for Christmas is to not give any f*&$s. Seems like it would be easier.
My sister responded with her usual loving candor: True, but so not you.
I’m no good at caring less, at feigning numbness, of only being half in. Passion motivates and energizes me. It also sends my attention and drive in a million directions. I’m bursting with ideas, questions, and causes. I feel the most alive when I’m advocating for something meaningful. I subscribe to the Church of Advocacy.
I recently realized that I feel closest to God and full of the most purpose when I’m advocating. God might be in chapels taking our offerings of reverence or in the mountains meeting us in meditation or on the capital steps lifting tired feet marching for a cause. No one place or person has a monopoly on God’s influence. If there is a God, I’ve heard that God whispering throughout my life; a steady hum urging me to do good through advocacy.
Whenever the hymn “Onward Christian Soldiers” shows up in the Sunday program, I always cringe a little at the first verse. It doesn’t speak to me in the same way it inspires others. Despite all of my passion, I’ve never related to being a soldier. I like the idea of being a Christian Ambassador better, carrying Christ’s banner of love, compassion, and hope. My God speaks to me through a desire to speak up and advocate for what’s right and good and loving. Do others with the same goals worship in different ways? Of course.