Competing voices are trying to narrate your life story. They tell you all kinds of versions of who you are and who you will be. These voices are added to the one inside your head. She is the harshest critic and has the highest expectations. Your life is accompanied by a constant dialogue doubting your parenting skills, telling you you’ll regret this, reminding you to cherish every moment, forecasting a future where you’ll long for today.
I just spoke with future you and she’s calling “bs” on that noisy, suffocating version of your life.
Future You made it to the other side of today’s challenges. She came out better, wiser, stronger, and more interesting. She didn’t always get it right, but she’s okay with that. Future You is living a dynamic, happy, fulfilling life. When today’s trials feel never ending, talk to her. She knows a thing or two about your struggles.
Future You isn’t getting by on stored up memories of better times. She doesn’t take a hit of baby smells and toddler tantrums to get through another day with teenagers. Her regrets over too much cell phone time don’t eat at her in retirement and she doesn’t wonder what to do with herself now that the kids are out of the house. Future You definitely doesn’t miss the endless loads of laundry.
Future You gives the current you grace. Her memories of failures, getting it wrong, and dashed hopes are mingled with love and compassion. Future You doesn’t stop current you at Target when your toddler is begging for popcorn and your baby is crying to remind you to “Enjoy this time while it lasts.” She gives your kids a smile, tells you your yoga pants rock, and prepares for her next adventure.
Future You found time for you. Sure, Future You might have delayed some of her wants for the birth of a child, Saturday soccer games, potty training, piano lessons, and slumber parties. But she found fulfilling ways to develop talents, cared for her needs, and prepared for a fulfilling future. Future You sees motherhood as one part of her identity, not a singular definition.
Future You is still writing your story and it’s a good one. While other people write about life in periods, future you composes in commas, semi-colons, and exclamation marks. She isn’t done writing your story and she has big plans for the upcoming chapters.
When the noise inside your head gets too loud, talk to the Future You. I think you’ll like what she has to say.