Choose Your Own Adventure

I was destined to star in my own Choose Your Own Adventure story. Who would I let narrate?

New York: Day 3

The morning began with vomit. Half of our family woke up barely able to move, with the other half eager to sight-see. I faced our non-refundable tickets to the 9/11 Memorial Museum with dread, wondering how to salvage the day.

This would usually be the part where I volunteer to stay home with sick kids while my husband continues with our plans alone. Except I was the healthy one this time and he wasn’t going anywhere.

A calm determination came over me as I considered my options. I encouraged my daughter to get ready, gathered our things, and googled the best way to travel from Union City, New Jersey to our destination. Me, two kids, and a still undiscovered New York City: Challenged accepted. 

I drove to the light rail park and ride, ignoring the clock, willing patience with traffic. I initially drove into the wrong parking lot, then past the right one, but we eventually made it. I’m not shy, but I buoyed myself to approach strangers about light rail tickets and getting on the correct train. An hour later, we found ourselves exiting the subway at the World Trade Center, after a cold walk and a transfer on the PATH station.

As I looked ahead at the 9/11 Museum and spied the glorious One World Trade Center to my left, a sense of relief washed over me. My courage, my patience with the journey, my wanderlust, my belief in my own abilities weren’t a fluke in Europe. Those were not character traits of a temporary Mindy. They were me now and me in the future.

You are Multi-Dimensional

We are often the harshest narrators of our own stories, painting ourselves as one-dimensional or static. Our voice-over asserts, You Are. You Can’t. You Won’t. It Will.

Except you are not a pre-determined character in a story, destined to be brave, shy, pretty, confident, plain, klutzy, reserved, daring, outgoing, or safe. 

It’s not courageous if it it’s not a little scary to begin with.

It’s not bold if there are no risks involved.

It’s not a challenge if you are completely certain of the outcome.

You are not growing if there are  no pains along the way.

Resist Foreshadowing

I’ve found that the trick, for me, is to not let the narrator foreshadow my story before it unfolds. Every great story is complex, multi-layered, filled with ups and downs.

Caution does not need to drown me in what-ifs.

Planning does not rule out spontaneity.

I can make room in my day for uncertainty, frustration, mistakes, and exhaustion.

Then I can make more room for the unexpected delights, figuring it out, things going as planned, and enjoying myself.

Embrace it All

I’m certain this is what the most confident, daring, determined, adventurous people do – they embrace it all as part of the adventure, shaping its whole, developing the story to its fullest.

Their fear brings courage.

Their doubts lead to hope.

Mistakes become experiences.

Problems create problem solvers.

The unexpected is what makes it an adventure after all.

The Best Day

Our day had plenty of bumps along the way, the biggest being a 4 year-old who wanted to lie down and be carried after about an hour. We battled the bitter wind and cold to try and find a burger place three times, with no success. Our feet became numb and the wind bit at our noses. Exhaustion threatened our fun.

I also enjoyed rare time with just two of my kids. We took our time through the 9/11 Memorial Museum, as I quietly explained exhibits to Ella. She read plaques and we took photos to bring home and share with Dad. We wrote a message of love on the wall for the victims, their families, and brave rescue workers. We held hands, stood in silence, and gained a new appreciation for life.

I saw the most beautiful 360 degree view of New York city from the top of the One World Trade Center. It rivaled the view from the Eiffel Tower in Paris. We didn’t even have plans to go up in the tower, but I just had this feeling it would complete our day. I could sit and look at that view for hours; taking in the city from above; eyeing the Statue of Liberty gloriously reaching to the sky; wondering at expansive bridges; gazing at the endless activity below.

My daughter grew bored and my son felt sick before I could take it all in. We gave up on eating in the city and headed to New Jersey with ease, tracing our path back the way we came. We stopped at a McDonalds for lunch because it was convenient and had a drive-through. We arrived home exhausted and cold.

And it was one of the best days of our vacation.