Anticipating Christmas in a New Way

This December, I find myself just as excited by Christmas as ever, but I’m moving at a different pace. For so much of life, Christmas has been about the anticipation of getting to the “big day.” But last night as I looked around my home yet to be decorated and thought about my closet with a few modest gifts for my children, I realized that something in me has changed.

In years past, Christmas has been the culminating event of each year, something worth anticipating for 12 months. For me, Christmas has always represent the shining light of the year. The kid in me feels elated as Christmas approaches and I want to crank up Bing Crosby, put up a fresh-cut tree, overwhelm it with red and green, and put touches of Christmas all throughout my  house.

I delight in the thrill of thinking about the people I love and purchasing presents for them. I could spend hours secretly researching websites for the very best deals so I can stretch my dollar as far as possible and overwhelm the tree with stacks of gifts. And I am not ashamed to admit that I feel excited by colorful gifts adorned with tags that declare “To: Mindy.” Just thinking about the pleasure of it all makes me giddy.

But this year, it seems as though Christmas snuck up on me a bit. Well, at least the present-focused, covering my house with decorations, eagerly pulling out the advent calendar Christmas. I’ve thought about Christmas quite a bit over the last month or so, fondly remembering the wonder of it and considering all that it represents. With my daughter growing older, I’ve also spent a great deal of time pondering how to help her focus on more on Christ and less on Santa.

Whenever friends ask if I’ve completed my Christmas shopping, I feel a bit dazed and puzzled. I’m nearly there now for my kids, but only recently purchased any gifts. Truthfully, my children happily play with the many toys the own. The gifts Ella received for her birthday in August have yet to lose their shine and Ezra is content with the many age-appropriate toys his sister enjoyed at his age. They don’t watch commercials, so most of Ella’s “wants” come from characters in books she reads or an encounter at the toy store.

While Tim and I, of course, have “wants,” but we don’t spend a lot of time dwelling on them these days. There isn’t much I want more than to get out of debt this year and start next  year fresh. I’d like a cooking class, a redesigned web page, digital scrapbooking software, and some cookware, but they can wait. I’d like my children to participate in purchasing their parents small gifts and we will probably buy a gift or two for each other, but I haven’t thought much about it.

Truthfully, I looked at my family last night and felt overwhelmed by my abundant life. As my daughter talked away and said random things such as “This is the best breakkast I ever had” and “Now that I’m married, what is my  name?” I felt overwhelmed by the opportunity to spend my days with her. When my son walked for the first time holding just one hand, I wanted to capture the proud look on his face and remember it forever. I felt such love for my husband who simply listened to me, supported me, and carried more than his share of the load this weekend. And I so appreciated time spent with wonderful friends who have opened their hearts to our family.

In times when so many are worried and struggling, I feel immense gratitude that I have so much – that my needs and so many of my wants are met daily. I feel overwhelmed with gratitude for my Savior Jesus Christ; for his birth, his example, his sacrifice, and his resurrection . While I still have plans to put up a tree tonight cheerfully decorate my home, and wrap brightly colored packages for my children to enjoy, these will not be the main focus of my celebration this year.

Instead, I am excited to sit down with my family each night to work on the nativity advent my sister sent us this year. I want to focus on the many gifts I already have instead of focusing on things to unwrap on the “big day.”  And, when Christmas Day does come, I want our celebration to center on the greatest gift our world has ever known.