“I had a really great time with you tonight. There was something different about this date. What was it?”
A Different Date Night
Driving home from a rare move and dinner date night, I turned to my husband with this question. He thought for a moment and said, “I had a great time too.” Then, “I guess you didn’t have your cell phone with you.”
I started reviewing the evening in my mind, beginning with the moment I left my cell phone with the babysitter. We rode in the car to the theater, no cell phone for me to just check “for a moment.” We sat in the theater, getting baby settled and waiting for the previews and I didn’t take a quick peek at Facebook or my email. After the movie, we made our way to the restaurant and enjoyed delicious food and conversation, no cell phone in site.
Tim had his cell phone, but I rarely remember him pulling it out during our date. Without the distraction of phones, we enjoyed an evening unplugged. The conversation flowed uninterrupted (except by baby) and we set the world aside for awhile.
The Experiment
This experience stayed with me and I decided to experiment in other areas of my life. It started simply, with a goal to spend my morning with the kids before school without my cell phone. At first, I would quickly glance through my phone when I first woke up in the morning, just to make sure I didn’t miss anything, maybe scrolling through for a few minutes.
Over time, I found my immediate need to plug in when I woke up fade. I eventually stopped remembering to take my phone to my room at night to plug in. I’d wake up and find the battery depleted and let it charge up during my morning routine. I didn’t miss it.
Purposefully unplugging felt so great that I started leaving my phone behind for all kinds of things. I didn’t need it near me for any meal (duh), play time (except to grab for photos), walks (except to tell the time), or one on one time with anyone. I did, however, need to start wearing a watch and charging the camera. 🙂
As I consistently unplugged, it became clear how my efforts to stay connected were disconnecting me from the people closest to me.
But I Still Love Technology
I am not a big fan of terms like “technology addict” or posts shaming moms for checking their cell phones at the 
park. Plugging in is a huge sanity saver for me!
But I found myself (and still struggle with this) having technology time be every moment of the day. Those notification beeps call to me no matter what I was doing. They distract me, even from people and projects I love. I needed balance. I craved balance (even if I didn’t know it).
Unplugged Doesn’t Look Complicated or Difficult
- It’s an uninterrupted 7 minutes pushing your toddler on a swing, just feeling the wind on your voice and listening to the joy in her laughter. Then, when she moves onto the slides, you take a Facebook break while she plays independently.
- It’s making 3 pm to 4 pm technology-free, so you can enjoy an uninterrupted hour with your kids after school.
- It’s a trip to the library where you spend the first 30 minutes seeking and reading books with the kids, then lounge and check Facebook while they play together in the play area.
- It’s turning off notifications during a lunch date with a friend, only checking for calls from the babysitter.
5 Ways to Unplug Your Life
- Still need a phone? Turn on your ringer. Turn off other notifications.
- It’s my camera! Click those shots, then set it somewhere inconvenient for “quick checks.”
- Charge it in a different room. Plug it in and leave it.
- Schedule time-out. This doesn’t have to be 1 hour periods. Test out 5 minutes, then stretch it out. You’ll be surprised by how much you don’t miss it.
- Schedule time-in. Social media helps me pay the bills, so I get it. My day requires checking social media throughout the day. It just doesn’t require me to be constantly on call.
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