I graduated from college 17 years ago. In December 2000, I was a month away from 21 and itching to leave my studies behind. I didn’t know what came next, but I know a big part of me anticipated grad school in the near future. While things went in a different direction, I always planned to go back. This summer, I decided to quit simply dreaming about school and apply to earn my degree online. So, in just 2 weeks, mom goes back to school.
My undergraduate degree is in English, with a minor in political science. I never knew exactly what I wanted to do or be with my degree. I just knew I wanted an excuse to read and discuss great literature and write about it all in the process. After graduation, I worked for a non profit, became a mom, pursued freelance work, and supported my husband through law school. I would tell myself, “I’m going back to school,” but the idea became more distant and frightening over time.
Classes don’t officially start for a week and a half, but my course modules are already available. As I peruse the topics and read chapters in advance, I feel a bit queasy and off-kilter. I normally fall asleep in just minutes, but I find myself wide awake at night. My normal confidence is slipping a bit, but I know my equilibrium will come. I’m just rusty at this school thing.
I’ve spent years waffling between different disciplines, never quite settling on one. Maybe that’s why I’ve never seriously pursued my master’s degree. Something changed over the past few years, as I recognized my love of teaching and training. Whether I am blogging about parenting, teaching a cloth 101 class, leading a Sunday School discussion, or working with a Girl Scout Troop, I am energized by teaching.
Big changes are coming in the future; for me, my family, and most likely this blog. I can earn my degree in 18 months if I attend full-time, but that’s an estimated 30 hours committed to school each week. I’ll still be here as The Inquisitive Mom, but maybe not as often. This blog is my safe place, but it’s time to move past simply feeling safe. 
Remember when I lost my blog and reclaimed my life? Those weren’t empty words – I’ve read, gardened, played, and stepped away from the computer more often and it feels amazing. School is a big step toward pushing myself to pursue new dreams and accomplish them. I’m thrilled, nervous, excited, anxious, and eager all at once. It feels odd to choose something just for me, but it’s time. In just two weeks, The Inquisitive Mom goes back to school.
Teaching is so rewarding (even if it’s just at home)! Congrats on your next big step. I envy you. All the things I have wanted to do (including applying for grad school and being denied twice to a competitive program) just don’t seem to work out. At the time I was in love with the discipline and gung ho. Now I can’t imagine doing that. But I’m not getting pushed in any particular direction, either. They say everyone has a ‘calling’ — but so far I feel like I’m getting shoved in a smaller and smaller box by the world. Meanwhile my kids see the world as wide open.
I’m glad you still have (or have regained) that world vision. <3 <3 <3